Rules for reflecting behavior.
1. Give it only when solicited.
Or at least ask if they want feedback first!
2. Describe do not evaluate.
Criticism is never well received.
3. Be specific not general.
Specificity has meaning.
4. Take into account your needs and those of the receiver.
Or it will fall on deaf ears.
5. Direct it toward behavior which the receiver can change.
Otherwise what is the point!
6. Time it well.
In the midst of an emotional crisis feedback is never well received.
7. Have the receiver mirror it back.
Reflecting your reflection keeps the mirror clean!