Drop the Anchor!

The bad news is I’m the problem. marshachair 214x300 - Drop the Anchor!
The good news is if I’m the problem I’m also the solution!

Steve Chandler

Have you ever had problems with someone only to discover you are the problem?

This happens to me all the time. I hate to admit it but it is true. I’ve tried to be perfect but of course that always fails because I’m not. Then I have tried to deny and blame the other, but that always backfires because I always have a part in it. At times, I have tried to pretend as if I have it all together, but then of course I’m fooling no one because I don’t. So, then I beat myself up for being so perfectly imperfect. Then wow, I get so excited because I have indeed found something that I can do correctly. I can in fact be perfectly imperfect!

Unfortunately, my ego so hates being wrong, human, and facing my own fallibility that I give myself quite a verbal tongue lashing. It would so much simpler if I stopped making myself miserable, and became okay with my perfect imperfections. Yet in my humanness I to often chose to hold onto the anchor of negative self talk that takes me down, instead of dropping this needless anchor of ego I carry round, and allow myself to graciously and joyfully float up the ladder of consciousness. Which can be done so simply by taking a deep breath, and letting go of my need to blame myself and others  and stop creating painful thoughts and emotions for myself!

Where can you drop the anchor of your ego?

How could you float up the ladder of consciousness?

When do you need to take a deep breath and let go?

What would it be like to remove your ego from the driver’s seat, and let your loving self take charge of your journey?

Would you like a place to explore letting go and moving up the ladder of consciousness? Then visit the websites below for information regarding the retreats I am offering this fall in beautiful Arizona! Join me in exploring our humanness with joy and grace!

Attend an Upcoming Retreat

      October – The Power of Your Presence

      November – Yoga and Horses

 

Love like a Stallion

equine collaborated coaches 300x214 - Love like a StallionHorses can teach us about life, if we take the time to observe, and understand their behavior. Fin, my Andalusian stallion reminds me of the importance of letting those we care about know that we do. Fin, like most stallions knows his first and foremost job is to support his herd. Fin nickers whenever his mare comes or goes, even for the shortest time. He can be in the pasture with his mare, and enter the stall next to her, two minutes later, and nicker as if he has been away from her for weeks. He is so delighted to see her. No matter her reception to him, Fin makes sure that his mare knows that he has her back, and he is there to protect her. He respects her “no”, and never pouts. He is always glad to see her and supports her.

In life, we could use this as a metaphor for how we attend to others in our life. What would it be like for your spouse, partner, colleague, boss, employee to know that you supported of them? That you were glad to see them? That you valued them?

How might this change your relationship with them?

Difficult relationships? Let’s talk.

Your Posture, Impacts You

Be fully in the moment, open yourself to the powerful energies dancing around you.
Ernest Hemingway

We know that our posture impacts how others see us, but did you know it also may impact how we feel about ourselves? We know that a change in facial expression such as a half-smile can lighten our mood. Amy Cuddy’s research supports the idea that intentional changes in our body posture impacts our physiology, thus changing how we feel about ourselves.

Here is a short clip of Amy Cuddy’s Ted Talk discussing the impact of body posing on physiology.

Amy Cuddy Shortened Ted Talk

If you are so inclined here is Amy’s Ted Talk in its’ entirety!

Body Language and Presence

Amy Cuddy discusses power poses in this video.

Power Poses

Practice using a power pose(s) throughout your day to move yourself to an emotional space of confidence, peace, power, and contentment. Does it change how you feel? Are you a powerful, peaceful person? Yes? Would you like to be even more powerful, present, and peaceful? If so, let me know!

The Value of Knowing Nothing

Communication solves all problems.
Steve Chandler

What is the value of knowing nothing about another?

This might be the one truth that is truly useful in forming and maintaining relationships, team building, and leadership. It forces us to call on our curiosity to learn about someone else and their circumstances.

Simple wonder, awe, sincere question asking creates a state that allows us to call forth that which is not yet known to either of us. Thus, providing a solid foundation for insight, exploration, and exchange.

Questions create clarity and understanding.

desireemarsha 214x300 - The Value of Knowing Nothing

What if You are Perfect?

q 214x300 - What if You are Perfect?I mean perfect as you are…that you did not need to change anything about yourself.

What if you knew that at the very core of yourself that you were not flawed but whole, and wise? That no matter what anyone said, or did past, or present, you did not question the wonder of who you are? You did not question what you knew to be true for you, and that it was okay for it not to be true for everyone.

What if you trusted your own choices?

What if it is perfect for you to change your mind? To make another choice?

What if it is perfectly okay to create the life you wanted?

And it is perfectly okay to ask for assistance, if it would be helpful to you!

 

Amongst the Wild Horses

I spent a day with the incredible, executive coach, and friend, Karen Davis. After we had played for several hours with my horses, and had a relaxing lunch, we made the hour drive to Tonto National Forest where we hoped to located and view one of the wild herds of Salt River Horses. As clear intention, or wonderful luck would have it we found, first a small band of three stallions, and then a larger herd with a stallion, mares, and babies.

I am always awed by the sight of these horses. They tolerate humans watching, and photographing them in stride. Yet they keep a reasonable distance. About 19 months ago these horses were destined to be rounded up, and most likely destroyed by the federal government, however the horses were saved by many individuals, and organizations that stood, and spoke up in order to save them. The state of AZ has acted to protect the wild horses. The people have requested that the Federal Government follow suit.

IMG 20170206 163814444 HDR 300x169 - Amongst the Wild Horses

When I stand among these wild horses, I am flooded with the feeling that these horses know that the people that come to see them, saved them, and they are grateful. Perhaps it is my own gratitude that flows out for these beautiful horses, in this amazing national land that has been preserved for us by those that stood up, and demand the right thing be done.

In those moments when I was full of being present to myself, the horses, to the land, to the connection that goes between the people, the land, and the horses something greater moved, and moments of oneness with all of it occurred for me. When I become still, and quiet with horses in nature the incredible occurs, and I find my peace, and place in the world.

Where do you find your peace? Where is your place in the world? Can’t find it, feeling lost? Contact me, I can help you find it.

Love, Marsha

PS. For more incredible BreathWork & Horses consider our October, Power of Your Presence Retreat!

PSS. Coming soon information on Yoga & Horses Retreat also in the beautiful Sonoran Desert November!

The Space Between

Life is lived in the expansion and contraction of the breath. Life is lived between the seconds, between the cells in the moments of presence to what is now in this moment…the moment inside me, the moment outside me, the moment in the connection to all that is greater than me. Expansion to see beyond me, Contraction to see within me. To be me, here, now before it becomes next. Life lived in this very breath, moment, space is where you find love and peace.
Expand, Contract, Breathe between your cells, the seconds, and find peace in the now.
No peace? Contact me to find peace.

Horses & Lunch

marsha and fin energy work - Horses & Lunch

Marsha Ferrick Coaching

The feminine energy of the mare pulls the herd. The masculine energy of the stallion pushes the herd. In concert, they keep the herd fed, watered and safe. They interact as a community. The energy of the lead mare and the stallion are different. She prefers to be followed. She is ahead of the group. She determines the forward momentum. The stallion follows his herd. He keeps them together, and he is the first line of defense, if a predator threatens the herd. He is typically bold in comparison to the wariness of his lead mare who trusts slowly, and approaches cautiously, if at all.

Last week I hosted a group of twenty + from around the globe to experience the power of Equine Collaborated Coaching at Full Circle Ranch B&B in Cave Creek, AZ. This is what Dave shared with me after he returned home from the event.

“I had a chance to use it as soon as I got home. Making lunches in my house has been a HUGE fight for years as we ask our kids, ages 7 and 9, to do it themselves. It usually involves lots of yelling, threatening, and then eventually me doing it for them.

After our work with the horses, I realized that my son responds well to pushing (masculine or yang) energy and my daughter pulling (feminine or yin) energy. So, when it came time, I told my son he needed to make his lunch and then pushed my energy towards the fridge with him in front of me. When he started to wander off, as he always does, a few minutes in, I just stepped in front of him and gently pushed my energy back toward him and his lunch. He went so easily!!!! Lunch was made, no problem.

With my daughter, we usually push and push with no response. So today after telling her it was time and she didn’t respond I just said, ‘Hey Scarlette, I’m just going to go ahead and do it for you,’ and started pulling things out. She immediately stepped in and did it all herself.

My wife was floored.”

What David did so adeptly was to generalize the herd dynamics he had learned in the Equine Collaborated Coaching session to social interactions with others, in this case his children. Once he understood the energy dynamic in his children, he could manage his internal energy in a way that guided his children to make their own lunches without drama, and in a cooperative manner. Voila! Peaceful family lunch-making time!

Where do things fall apart for you in relationships? Are there times and situations in which you are puzzled by the dynamics that occurs between you and others? Do you have difficulty with certain people? If so, consider your energy. Do you push people or pull people? How about the individuals around you? What energy do they put out? How do you manage your energy with others?

If this sounds interesting to you, and you would like to discuss it contact me.

Love, Marsha
PS. Our April, Power of Your Presence Retreat is already full, so hold your space in our October Power of Your Presence Retreat now!

Suffering Options!

SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL this holiday season!

This may be hard to believe if you struggle with family members.

Here are some skills I teach clients that struggle with family events.

First, you get to choose. So, stay empowered in that choice.
 
You really do not have to go anywhere, or invite anyone to your house.

Second, stay focused on WHY you made the choice.
 
Mom might not be here next year.
The children love to play with their cousins.
Support my partner.
Whatever your reason, it is okay to go, or not, invite or not.

Third, you can change your mind and make a different choice.
 
It is okay to leave at any point if you so choose.
It is okay to ask someone to leave your home.

Fourth, have clear limits.
 
Screaming and yelling occurs, I go home.

Fifth, create the time you want to have. Do you want to have a…
 
Quiet, relaxing, and peaceful time?
Playful and fun?
Helpful and engaged?

Then set out to make that happen. Remember no one can get in the way of that unless you choose to let them!

Still suffering? Want to stop? Let’s talk!

Holiday Nuts?

unnamedI had come into a store, outside someone in the three car traffic line was blowing their horn at an elderly lady with a cane crossing the parking lot driveway to get into the store, or at a store worker moving a long line of shopping carts back into the store. Nuts, I thought, after all neither was able to move any faster despite the blaring horn. I was pondering this seemingly nonsensical act as I spied a big display entitled HOLIDAY NUTS $4.98!

Now truly that was apropos, Holiday Nuts! Laughing out loud and shaking my head at the scene outside, I examined the bags of nuts for the upcoming festivities when the person next to me laughed and said, “Holiday Nuts, my family,” and then I thought holiday nuts, the way you feel when life feels out of control during the upcoming month!

What comes to mind when you think Holiday Nuts?

Is it your own or others insanity during the holidays?
Is it how you feel when your with your family or simply thinking about them?
Is it the actual nuts themselves? Pecans, walnuts, peanuts, almonds…?

Consider how many ways to be nuts there are out there during the holidays? Then smile, laugh, and enjoy being a holiday nut amongst the holiday nuts, during the holiday nuttiest time of the year! Oh, and have some Holiday Nuts while you are at it!

Having trouble dealing with the Holiday Nuts? Contact me.